we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I touched a dick in church today
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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