Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
