eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Randomize
