and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
