Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
