Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
