Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
