you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
