someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
