Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
