i would punch a child for taco bell
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
