Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
