So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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