so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
operation have a gay friend backfired
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
