I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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