it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
