So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
