Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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