Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize