I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize