I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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