those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
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