I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
