Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
