I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
love makes seman taste better
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
