i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
