i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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