We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I think I have vodka in my lungs
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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