I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
