Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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