I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
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