she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
