Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
