Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
