I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
