God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
