he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
