Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
