whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
