we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
