I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
