Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
