I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
You need Xanax blowdarts
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
last night I used snow as a chaser
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
