I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize