So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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