Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
