I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
