ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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