if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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