My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
